Also, to make up for my recent charitable neglect, I'm encouraging you all to donate to my friend's worthy cause. I did. AND IT FELT GOOD. Even if it's $5, every little bit helps. BUST A MOVE, YO.
***
Oh hi. I'm Ben.
You might know me as Tia's #1 Canadian. Or that guy that squatted on her couch to see Kelly Clarkson. But not before heaving the entire contents of his innards into her toilet after not being able to hack Californian gay bars.
(I'm fantastic.)
I'm here today to speak with you about something important: Tia's boobs.
(They're also fantastic.)
Yes - Tia can fill out a dress like whoa. They are wonderful in every booby way and we all know that gay men love them some boobs. Although exactly why remains one of life's great mysteries. I'm going to chalk it up to something to do with our passion for accessories and gratuitous sexuality.
If I could cup, lift and prop out my junk for all to see in a socially acceptable way, I probably would too.
But that's besides the point.
I'm doing something kind of crazy for the sake of boobs like Tia's everywhere. I have committed to doing six consecutive one-hour fitness classes in a single day on January 30, 2010.
Not only that, but I'll be helping to raise a total of $1 million for new digital mammography technology.
Not only that, but I'll be setting two Guinness World Records.
Not only that, but the one and only Richard Simmons will be teaching one of those classes.
Not only that, but I'll be doing the entire thing in short shorts.
I could give you more reasons why you should donate to my cause but I'm pretty sure you're all still completely distracted by how sexy I am in those socks. It's okay. Give in to it. Awwww yeeeaaaaah. That's riiiiiiight.
But seriously.
I look hot, right?
So you should give me money. If you donate, you'll be doing something amazing for women everywhere and you will literally be saving lives. Every single penny donated goes directly to the cost of the new mammography equipment. EVERY CENT.
That's more than that US Weekly and Starbucks Latté can say.
(Unless they're superhero versions of magazines and coffees in which case I'll let you make up your own mind.)
(But I'll always look better in shorts.)
Donate. For serious. I won't let you down.
You might know me as Tia's #1 Canadian. Or that guy that squatted on her couch to see Kelly Clarkson. But not before heaving the entire contents of his innards into her toilet after not being able to hack Californian gay bars.
(I'm fantastic.)
I'm here today to speak with you about something important: Tia's boobs.
(They're also fantastic.)
Yes - Tia can fill out a dress like whoa. They are wonderful in every booby way and we all know that gay men love them some boobs. Although exactly why remains one of life's great mysteries. I'm going to chalk it up to something to do with our passion for accessories and gratuitous sexuality.
If I could cup, lift and prop out my junk for all to see in a socially acceptable way, I probably would too.
But that's besides the point.
I'm doing something kind of crazy for the sake of boobs like Tia's everywhere. I have committed to doing six consecutive one-hour fitness classes in a single day on January 30, 2010.
Not only that, but I'll be helping to raise a total of $1 million for new digital mammography technology.
Not only that, but I'll be setting two Guinness World Records.
Not only that, but the one and only Richard Simmons will be teaching one of those classes.
Not only that, but I'll be doing the entire thing in short shorts.
I could give you more reasons why you should donate to my cause but I'm pretty sure you're all still completely distracted by how sexy I am in those socks. It's okay. Give in to it. Awwww yeeeaaaaah. That's riiiiiiight.
But seriously.
I look hot, right?
So you should give me money. If you donate, you'll be doing something amazing for women everywhere and you will literally be saving lives. Every single penny donated goes directly to the cost of the new mammography equipment. EVERY CENT.
That's more than that US Weekly and Starbucks Latté can say.
(Unless they're superhero versions of magazines and coffees in which case I'll let you make up your own mind.)
(But I'll always look better in shorts.)
Donate. For serious. I won't let you down.
Posts
10 comments:
Lol! Does he have a blog?! He is hilarious! What a great cause!!
Sounds like a wonderful cause :)
Maybe I'll be generous and donate. Just maybe.
PS: Yes, we gays love the boobs. I still haven't come to understand why, and, honestly, it kind of concerns my best friend D:
~J*~
This really makes me wish I had some gay friends. I am clearly missing out. :(
Take OFF the socks honey!! woo hoo!!
As a woman who has to start getting mammograms at the age of 25 (yes, that is only 8 months from now) because of family history I strongly support the boobs as well.
Rock on with the donations. I donate yearly on behalf of my momma.
Hugs!
Awesome cause, Ben and Tia!
Brilliant!! Those socks are so hot right now! Good luck with this excellent fund raising effort, hope it all goes well. Now, just need to find someone to do this in South Africa too!
Sue x
Loving the socks, Ben. I have a pair almost just like them that I play softball in. I'm a hit.
Save the ta-ta's....
I see a couple of spirits on the picture of Ben. The large fog all about him is one and then there are a couple of orbits also. Possibly like spirits are just following him because he seems to be happy in the photo which leads me to believe they are nice spirits that just want to hang around him. Just telling you what I saw...and in all good intentions. I have seem many of these in photos and enjoy studying them. These are safe ones. I follow and enjoy your blog and when I saw this picture I knew instantly there were spirits with Ben.
Do it for the boobies! And because Ben is adorable.
Ben is my hero!!!! :)
Post a Comment